Sunday, February 27, 2011

The Academy Awards 2011 -- The People


The narcissism of it!  They make movies to be famous and make money.  Then they give themselves an award show to congratulate each other on how wonderful they are for making movies, being famous for making movies, and making all of that money.  Because we went to see them in their movies.  Then they make us watch the award show so they can be more famous and make more money and movies.  Why do these people need to be heard?  Who cares what they have to say.  What makes people so self-important that they think we hang on their every word...that they have anything to say that's worth listening to?!?  Ignore them.  F@#$ers.  Now, on to what you've been waiting all year for -- my thoughts!  You are welcome.

The People
Best Actor
  • Javier Bardem, Biutiful -- He's good, but it's a foreign language film.  Who knows what he was really saying?  (And they don't even know how to spell beautiful...sheesh!)

  • Jeff Bridges, True Grit -- What a great idea!  Put Jeff Bridges in a western setting in dirty cowboy clothes and have him play a drunken has-been.  Original.  Never been done before!  He won last year and deserved it, but as another cowboy once said: "Timing has a lot to do with the outcome of a raindance".  No rain for Bridges this year.
  • Jesse Eisenberg, The Social Network -- I'll admit, the degree-of-difficulty for this role was low.  Playing a detestable character who completely lacked animation and simply talked fast and never moved his neck should be easy to pull off.  But Eisenberg had to convey a lot of emotion while locked into this very well-known persona and he pulls it off.  In another year, he gets a little gold man with no junk.  But at least he made people aware that he wasn't Michael Cera.  
  • Colin Firth, The Kings Speech -- Playing a character with a disability gets you on an Oscar short li-li-list.  Playing one who needed to overcome his affliction to defeat fascism makes you a lock.  I actually want Firth to win more because of his performance in A Single Man that I believe was overlooked.  Donna said precisely the right thing:  "He's cute, but I couldn't get beyond the studder."  No risk of losing her to a dead monarch...check!  
  • James Franco, 127 Hours -- This is a helluva story, so you'd have to bungle the part not to be considered for an Oscar, but Franco really surprises.  Like Social Network and King's Speech, you know exactly what's going to happen and how things will turn out going into the theater, but Franco ensured that you were on the edge of your seat the whole time.  The only complaint I have is that the video tape he replays has Kate Mara wondering if he's right about hiking naked.  I'm a dirty old man -- I can't recover from distractions like that easily.  Before you know it, I'm wishing Kate was in the brat pack movies instead of Mare Winningham.  Doesn't take much.

Best Actress

  • Annette Bening, The Kids are Alright -- I am a huge Bening fan, particularly since American Beauty.  She was wonderful here, so much so that she overshadowed a terrific performance by Julianne Moore.  Lesbian mom in a love triangle is strong stuff.  But it's a fart in a windstorm compared to Natalie Portman.  She brings "lezie", as my anachronistic wife likes to say, as well, but gets to add drug addiction as a result of a domineering mother, being used by her dance director and, the piece of resistance -- she's batshit crazy.  Sorry, Annette.  
  • Nicole Kidman, Rabbit Hole -- Nobody saw this movie.  Not even me.  Besides, Nicole's already got a little gold man for The Hours.
  • Jennifer Lawrence, Winter's Bone -- This was a terrific performance.  You felt the burden this young lady was carrying with a crazy mother and a missing father.  But she has no chance this year.  She could've gotten it on with the kid from Kick-Ass and she still wouldn't get a statue.  
  • Natalie Portman, The Black Swan -- She's already cleared a spot on the mantle, and it ain't for the cremated remains of Yoda.  This one's a lock.  It was a disturbing movie, largely due to her impressive performance, but I still haven't forgiven her for contributing to the decline of the Star Wars series with performances that had more wood than a German gonzo porn film. 
  • Michelle Williams, Blue Valentine -- A terrific actress (amazing in Brokeback Mountain), but completely overshadowed this year.
Best Supporting Actress
  • Amy Adams, The Fighter -- A wonderful performance that will be overshadowed by Melissa Leo in the same film, which is a shame.  I found her cloying in Julie and Julia, but she showed real chops here.  I've heard that her accent wasn't "authentic" for that part of Massachusetts, so let's hope that massive and thriving film arts community in Lowell, Mass are forgiving.  No statue, however, when you're not even the best actress in your movie.
  • Melissa Leo, The Fighter -- Loved her, but I think it was the reflective crazy of the batshit family, not just her solo performance, that made it so compelling.  It just wouldn't have been that singular without the cadre of ugly-to-the-bone sisters.  Besides, she campaigned for herself.  We don't like this.  We like our actresses faux-humble
  • Helena Bonham Carter, The Kings Speech -- It's nice to see her undistorted by Tim Burton, but she's fifth out of five in this category.  
  • Hailee Steinfeld, True Grit -- In the Coen brothers' version of this classic western, Mattie Ross is the central character and Hailee carries the day.  Of course, I screwed up big time by telling Donna before the movie that she was 10-years-old (part of the sales pitch -- read: lies -- necessary to get her to watch a western).  "She's not 10-years-old.  What were you thinking?  You weren't thinking.  Ten.  Huh.  10."  Talk about distracted -- completely wiped the naked Kate Mara from my mind.  The Academy won't give it to a kid, but I think her performance was best this year.  
  • Jackie Weaver, Animal Kingdom -- Loved this movie!  If you haven't seen it, please rent it.  I was a little surprised the screenplay wasn't nominated, but Jackie Weaver deservedly gets in.  She plays cool, calculating evil with a smile as well as I've seen it for some time.  Donna's not a fan of accented movies, but this one held her interest and we both loved the ending.
Best Supporting Actor
  • Christian Bale, The Fighter -- This is a lock.  And I don't even like this guy.  He completely dominated the movie, sucking the air out of the room every time he appeared.  There won't be any surprise in this category.
  • John Hawkes, Winter's Bone -- A compelling performance that will be overlooked because of Bale's portrayal of Dickie Eklund.  
  • Jeremy Renner, The Town -- A compelling performance that will be overlooked because of Bale's portrayal of Dickie Eklund.  
  • Mark Ruffalo, The Kids Are Alright -- A compelling performance that will be overlooked because of Bale's portrayal of Dickie Eklund.  
  • Geoffrey Rush, The Kings Speech -- A compelling performance that will be overlooked because of Bale's portrayal of Dickie Eklund.  
Best Director
  • Darren Aronofsky, Black Swan -- An admirable job, but he got his prize by getting to be on the set when Natalie and Mila made out.  Have that gold-plated, Darren, and count your blessings.
  • David O. Russell, The Fighter -- A wonderful film and put together beautifully, but this movie was about outsized acting performances, not direction.  
  • Tom Hooper, The Kings Speech -- This position description is like an 80s camera advertisement:  Just point and shoot.  Sorry, Hoop.  Rush and Firth did all the heavy lifting here.
  • David Fincher, The Social Network -- This was a brilliant directing effort and I believe David should win.  I suspect, given the hype, that Kings Speech will carry best picture, but I'm hopeful that this will be one of those rare years ector Oscar winner.
  • True Grit, The Coen Brothers --  These guys know how to make movies and they don't follow a formula.  But this is not their best work and it's not this year's best directing effort.  They should not have gotten the nomination and I should be writing about Danny Boyle here, but instead our British friend of Slumdog Millionaire fame doesn't get an indented bullet.  You got my wife to enjoy a western, but you don't get a statue.
I think Danny Boyle was robbed by not getting a nomination.  127 Hours was not a one-man show, though Franco's performance was central to its success.  This could easily have been a boring movie about an unbelievable true-life story.  But Boyle kept it gripping and entertaining, not just 90 minutes of waiting for the amputation scene.  Even his teasers at the beginning of the movie -- knowing we're all waiting for Aron to get trapped -- were clever.  The dream and hallucination scenes were well done and contributed to the story without being neon signs that the main character was "losing it now".  This non-nom was a mistake.

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